Life and Times of Walter and Ben

A glimpse into the life that Ben and I shared every day while going to college

The day was going great, and stayed that way. Me’n Ben skipped first period to go eat Mcdonalds breakfast.

Pokechop and I yelled at emo kids from the Smoker’s Table (more stories to come about this place). I skipped second period too. After promising Ben that I would go.

Don’t cry!
It’s not so bad, it’s just living. You’ve been doing it you’re whole life!
Stay away from the wrist violin!
What’s up!? Not your sperm count! Stop wearing your sisters pants!

All good times. Ben never did any of this stuff. He was nice. Not me though.

I went to History. The only class I actually liked.

“Hey Ben.”
“Yo.”
“Let’s go home and play Melee! I’m tired of this place!”
“Okay!”

So we skipped fourth period and went home. We ended up going to Wal-Mart first. We both noticed this guy wearing a really nice suit standing outside of the entrance and knew instantly that he was…one…of those… The guys that ask for money. I thought he was going to ask because of some stupid reason like…I don’t know. I can’t come up with anything right now.

He had a good one.

Man: “Excuse me, sir? Would you like to donate money to help feed the homeless?”
Me: “Homeless!? Well, Hell yeah! Feed the homeless!”
Ben: *blank stare of disbelief*
Me: *looks back at Ben* What?
Man: “Thank…you?”

It ends up that I gave this guy 20 of my 25 bucks and I didn’t have enough money to pay for my two boxes of cheez-its and two liter of Orange Drank.

There was a whole lot more in this post before my computer at work crashed and auto-saved my newly found “empty” draft. Lost the entire blog. My memory works in spurts! And I forgot the entire day except for these things.

Give some of your moneys or whatever you can to some of these folk who ain’t got nothing. I guarantee that I would have been thankful to have some cheez-its.

Dreams are weird

I had just got back home from Iraq. The family and I were all at Ross Barnett Lake sitting and having a nice picnic. My mom looked behind me and pointed. There she stood, my ex. Naked except for a blindfold. She opened up her mouth and out poured fog. It covered everyone and everything except the space between herself and I. She was about 30 feet away. She started laughing and then became part of the fog herself. I called out to my family, but could not hear anyone calling out to me. I was furious. Not only that she intruded into my life, but my family was hidden from me because of her. I felt waves of anger pushing out from my body. The waves were similar to the “powering up” waves that Goku or any of the other Dragonball Z characters might do. The waves ended up being a flaming sphere that surrounded me with lightning surging through it. I could feel my teeth grinding under my tense jaw. My hands bled from my fingernails digging into my palms. The waves expanded slowly, pushing away the fog. I found them all, my family.

Strange dream. Yesterday my brother had a small talk about her. There has been alot of fog here lately in Iraq. The rain has put alot of moisture into the air. The humid air gets hot in the day and then cools down rapidly at night. I think that’s what makes fog. I think that’s where the parts of this dream come from. *shrug* Moving on! Lame dream.

I woke up around noon-thirty and ended up going back to sleep around two thirty or three. I had a really good dream, then! Oh man. I went about my normal day-to-day life. Eating, sleeping, showering and shaving. Driving and spending time with Jonathan and Paul. Brushing my teeth and laughing. You know that feeling where someone is watching you? I felt that feeling, but I could tell it was my wife. The feeling wasn’t that creepy side of being watched. I felt like I was looking back at her with ‘pillow eyes’. The ‘*blissful sigh* “I’m so loved.”‘ eyes. Anyways, that’s what I felt the whole dream. It was without a doubt one of the best dreams I’ve ever felt.

That was my dreams of last night. Do you ever have a weird/stressful dream and then go back to sleep being surprised by having a fantastic one? Don’t worry, my next blog won’t be so ominous or foreboding. I’ve just had lots of weird dreams lately. I’m waiting until next week to post one of the dreams I had this past weekend.

I love…Fridays

I love…James and the Giant Peach. Do you guys remember that movie? My little brother Jonathan got to see it in theaters when he was a kid. I’m jealous, that movie is hilarious. “Now I’ve got two half brothers…” Classic!

I love…The Terminator. Even though Arnold was a robot. More appropriately, living tissue over metal endoskeleton. This guy had heart. He had his arm ripped off and still he was trying to save John and Sarah. No, not my John and Sarah. It would be really cool if they had a terminator though.

I love…America! Fuck yeah!

I love…the Flintstone vitamins my wife sent me in the mail. I enjoy taking them every morning and pretending I’m back in RI reminding her to take them herself.

I love…my post yesterday. Did you reading it!? You better’ve.

What do you love today? What do you love everyday?

Thoughtful Thursday

I was sitting around work Wednesday night and didn’t have much to do, so I started to read my bible.  My favorite book of the bible is the book of Matthew, what I like about it most is that it can be used for all sorts of things.  Not just faith, but every day life.  There was this one passage that I read that reminded me of the troubles that my family was having while I was in highschool.

“I wonder if those pants are dry,” I would think as I lay there in bed. “I turned on the heat in the bathroom, but that may not have been enough.  Jeans take a long time to dry.  Holds in the water.”  I would finally get out of bed and go to find that the pants were indeed, still wet.  “Crap!  I’ve only got an hour before school!”  So I’d have to take out a cookie sheet and put my pants onto it and then into the oven.

Not only did worrying not get my pants dry, but made me feel like crap for nothing.  They either would be dry, or I would have to send them for a quick run through the oven.  No big deal.  I eventually got tired of waking up to wet pants, so I started getting up earlier to bake ‘em.  Or I would do it at night before I went to sleep.  No lazy for me.

Not dry, even though I worried.

Before I came to Iraq from Mississippi, I worried alot.  I worried about getting hurt.  I worried about dying.  I didn’t want to leave the burden of my death on my friends or loved ones, if I was hurt or worse.  For the most part though, I didn’t want anyone in my family to get hurt while I was gone.  Do you have any idea how many people are killed a year in car accidents!? 25,351 deaths in 2008 alone. I’m less likely to get hurt in Iraq than my family is back home.  In the six years since the war started in Iraq, 4363 military personnel have lost their lives while serving in Iraq. I am safer than my family!

I still think about my family getting hurt.  Quite alot, actually.  What if someone gets hurt?  What can I do?  Nothing.  As soon as a red cross message comes in, I will be transported back to The States.  That could take 2-5 days.  There’s a small amount of consolation in being totally helpless.  *shrug*  It sucks, but I have to accept it.  I don’t have time to worry, because I won’t be able to do anything.

Matthew 6:27:  Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
Matthew 6:34:  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

There is a time and place for worry, but if you can’t do anything about it…why put yourself through that kind of stess?  What do you worry about?  I mean real shit.  Not whether or not your clothes are dry.

Stop having a pussy and man up by ignoring your problems until they give you high blood pressure!

To Whom it May Concern

Dear People of Omegle,

I know my wife is strange, but that is that such a bad thing? It takes people who are weird to get things done. Like…Thomas Jefferson. He was a weirdo. He flew kites in the middle of a lightning storm. He was a pioneer!, and a good role model, at that! Maybe not a role model. Kids flying kites in the middle of storms is a bad idea. I digress!

You shouldn’t be so hard on her, PoO. (I said poo.) She means well 99% of the time. Even if it ends horribly, she really does. She doesn’t mean to call you a Ho, or insult your intelligence by typing such difficult words like ‘touche’.

She apologizes to strangers. Even to strangers that she didn’t mean to not insult. She really is wonderful once you get to know her. How she is wonderful, oh how I should list the ways. For her benefit.

1) She puts her tube of chapstick into her nose. She runs out of pocket space, I guess.
2) Sometimes when she laughs too hard, she snorts. A wonder to behold.
3) Gift cards are her preferred gift of choice. How great is that!?
4) Participation in every single “support” cause is a must.
5) Her addiction to Facebook games isn’t because she’s weird, it’s cuz she has nothing else better to do with her time.
6) Breakfast consists of chocolate milk.
7) She doesn’t collect dimes. She doesn’t spend them. There’s a difference. Get you head out you ass and reco-nize!
8.) Self proclaimed geek. It’s so kawaii.
9) She thinks I’m handsome.
10) Married me.
11) She’s really cool! … No, seriously. She is.

See? This proves it. She isn’t weird at all. If you’d only give her the chance to show you. I, for one, find that your sudden disconnections are rude. You wouldn’t do that to a stranger, would you? Just…walk away from them in the middle of a sentence. I guess you would, in retrospect Netiquette does not mean being an ass.

Stew foo n00bs

kthxbaiplOx gaiz,
Walter Hughes

I love…Fridays!

I haven’t posted in a week.  Sorry guys.  Been a little busy and haven’t been in the mood to post anything.  But I gotta post ILF!  It helps me to think of happy things.

I love…looking at my wife.  My sole reason for wanting laser eye surgery is so I can look at her when I’m not wearing my glasses at night.
I love…D&D!!!  It’s so much fun!  I’ve got a level 5 sorceress and she kicks butts.
I love…not being a blogger.
I love…peeing while I’m outside.  Haven’t done it in a while, but I haven’t forgotten about you.
I love…bananas!  B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
I love…that I am one day closer.  Not one day away.
I love…looking at my wife.  Seriously.
I love…being a veteran and having so much support from all sorts of people.
I love…that I’m going to wax my neck hair one day.  They are the only thing about shaving that I hate.  Soon as I can get my hands on some tweezers I’ll start yankin’ those dudes out.  Force the boogers to regrow from scratch.  Instead of being so coarse, they supposedly grow back all thin like when they were first started growin’.  It’s a good idea that I’m willing to try.  I’ve heard that if folk wax their legs long enough that the hair will stop growing entirely.
I love…watching guys who are awkward around females.  So cute.  Reminds me of myself when I was younger.  A week ago.
I love…my penis.  You rockzors my boxers.
I love…Glee music(s).
I love…threatening my wife with spousal abuse.
I love…Force Lightning.

What makes you happy?  What do you love?  Don’t forget your penis.  Whether it is attached to your body, or some form of boyfriend.

I love…Fridays!!!

 

I love…Rumbling Hearts.  Look it up on Hulu. pl0x

I love…learning.

I love…drugging my wife with theraflu so she will sleep while I play Call of Duty 4.  Don’t judge me!

I love…Micah.  He’s one of my best friends, and he understands me perfectly!  I love that guy.

I love…when Lee kisses my cheek and then rubs it in before I can rub it off. ^^

I love…that Alli’s feet were dirty in that picture. lulz

I love…discussing religion with people.  The ones who aren’t all fire and brimstone, anyways.

I love…the care packages I get from complete strangers!  Go Contra Costa Blue Star Mom!

I love…talking to my wife at night before I go to sleep.

 

These things get me through the week.  Some of these things are small or non-existent to some people out there, but to me; they are cherished.   What do you love?  What gets you through the week?

Wednesday’s blog

Random thought.

God can’t see sin, right?  Then how does He see His sons and daughters?  We are full of sin.  Then again…when Jesus died, He died for our sins.  He took our sin from us so that we may be welcomed into God’s Kingdom.  But I was taught that our sins are only removed once we go stand in front of St. Peter.  When the Book of Life is thrown at us.  THEN Jesus cleanses our souls.  Maybe God sees us with little black spots located here and there on our soul.  Only when we confess of that sin, is the black spot removed.  Not looking at a dalmatian man makes Him happy.  He’s more of an exotic pet type person anyways. 

Then…HEAVEN TIME!  *raises the roof*

Given, not Taken

I was sitting around at work earlier thinking about something.  And I’m getting around to saying what it is.  At my own pace.  Stop being so dang impatient, reader.

When a group of women or men who are on television shows explaining their experiences on how they were hurt, the host always says something similar to “don’t make yourself a victim.”  Don’t put yourself in the position to be taken advantage of.  What kind of life is this?  To not trust anyone, ever…  Not a good one, I think.  To say “don’t make yourself a victim,” is to pretty much say that you were at fault.  Why?  Because by your choice of words, “‘I’ made myself a victim.”  The victim is never at fault.  So take that first saying and shove it up your ass.  Right up there.

How about putting a new message out there?  “Don’t victimize people.”  This is so much better of an answer, it’s retahded.  It all starts at the family level.  The government’s commercials are not enough.  It only takes your child forgetting these messages once to ruin someone.  Teach your kids to respect the life and well-being of others.

99% of all sexual assault charges in the US are by male offenders.  The problem isn’t with women, who are at great risk.  It’s with the men who take advantage of the women.  In the military, the figures are nearly the same.  I believe it is 98% caused by male perpetrators.  You there, guy.  Stop being a pussy.

It’s not okay.  It’s not just a simple mistake.  And guess what, you’re an asshole.

That’s all I really got, today.

I love…Friday!

I love…my scalp to be picked at.
I love…sexist remarks.
I love…XM8 weapon system.
I love…zombies.
I love…my wife.
I love…GLEE!!!
I love…Bacon.
I love…eating chickens.
I love…that I’m going back home, eventually.
I love…music.
I love…D&D.
I love…skype.

I love all these things. They get me through the week and I think about them all. Leave a comment telling me what you love.